Don't Read This Either! More Potter Ramblings

I am more than halfway through the final book of the Harry Potter saga. I can't deny that listening to it on CD, every day I wish my commute was a little bit longer. But inside my forehead there's a bored whisper. It sounds like Simon Pegg, and it says, "Skip to the end..."

I've always had issues with Rowling's sentences, plotting, and plot-creep cheats. "[blank] swelled up in Harry's chest like a balloon." All those important conversations interrupted by "then they heard voices," and not resumed for weeks. The "You didn't know about these before because [they didn't exist until this book]" excuse. Plus there's that ever-present "It must be Snape!" thing, when it's so obviously not. Rowling has no poker face, as Deathly Hallows often demonstrates.

But I was sucked in anyway, because of the characters and the characterizations of Jim Dale, who reads the audiobooks. Without them, the series would be a chore.

Case in point, The Deathy Hallows. The setup at the end of The Half-Blood Prince was intriguing. Harry planned to skip his last semester at Hogwarts to hunt down Voldemort. I didn't think Rowling would actually go through with it. But she did, and it's shocking how badly the plot stumbles without the school framework. How's a woman supposed to know when to advance the plot if there's no summer vacation, Halloween, Valentine's Day, or trips to Hogsmead?

Worse, taking the heroes out of Hogwarts means no character interaction. So far, Harry, Ron, and Hermione have spent most of their time sitting around, sophomorically speculating in circles, waiting for things to happen to them. When it does, one or two characters from Rowling's sprawling cast might make a cameo appearance. "Look, there in that paragraph! It's Luna Lovegood! And her father's in this book, too! Wow, that was fast. Oh, right, Draco! Forgot about him. I wonder if anything's going on with Neville. Kind of odd we haven't seen him yet, don't you think?"

I might as well be watching one of the movies, hoping for a brief scene where Alan Rickman is given a chance to speak.