Schaffer The Darklord

I went to The Knitting Factory last night. While all the cool goth kids who complimented me on my Voltaire T-shirt were there to see Creature Feature on another stage, I was in attendance to support MC Frontalot.

Due to Thanksgiving and Rock Band commitments, attendance was light and extra dorky. It's just as well. Anyone who didn't know what was coming would have fled when Pitch White opened with a set dedicated to Max Hardcore. It was exactly what anyone who didn't know better would expect from nerdcore: an excuse for some skinny white boy to indulge in misogyny disguised as parody.

I'm glad I stuck it out.

MC Frontalot's show was pretty much the same as the last time I saw it back at PAX, except on a smaller stage and with a new drummer. Those saving throws never seem to pan out unexpectedly. Despite some sound issues and a setlist I've mostly heard before, it was cool to see his band perform in an intimate venue. I finally got to tell Gminor7 how awesome he is on the keyboard and onstage.

The revelation of the night, though, was Schaffer The Darklord. I believe we've written about it in the past, but I don't feel like looking it up. Good nerdcore is always better live. Studio albums and MySpace tracks may not impress you until you see a show. The video below is a reasonable promise of what to expect from him, though.



Listening to his first album, he seemed to be inspired more by Tenacious D than geek stuff. I should have asked him about that. The songs on Mark of the Beast, however, are like some weird combination of Voltaire in comedy mode and a rapping Ted Raimi. And though I love Voltaire, I have to give credit where it's due. "Revenge of Attack of the Clonefucker" beats all but "Sexy Data Tango" lyrically when it comes to vulgar sci-fi songs. And though Voltaire's son may have wondered if Jesus was a zombie, Schaeffer The Darklord wrote a song about it.

Hey, what do you know? There's a perfectly audible live video clip of it on the Internet. With post-song commentary!

Whether you're a nerdcore convert, skeptic, or hater, I urge you to check out STD live for comedic value alone. Don't be surprised if you find yourself endorsing geeky, unhip, unheard of music on your blog (when you finally get around to posting) if you do.

I have done as I vowed, Darklord, and praised you on my blog that eight people read. Will you reward me by returning to L.A.? Preferably at a time when relatives aren't around and Rock Band II hasn't just come out? I beg of thee, my dark lord of rappistry. Please look kindly on my plea.

PAX: Nerdcore Rising, Mega Man Falling

You may not know that nerdcore music rocks harder live. Before PAX, what I had listened to of Optimus Rhyme had only convinced me that, "Yeah, it's pretty neat." Now, I'm a believer. Part of this is the usual hit-or-miss problems that crop up when small independent groups enter the studio. The group goes in, records a good set, and then some damn fool says to themselves, "Hey, all of that RAWK is getting in the way of Count Lyle's mellifluous voice! I'd better fix that."

Meanwhile, M.C. Frontalot's studio works possess a superior studio mix, but I preferred his live backup to the rotating cast of starts he grabbed for his album. That said, I'm still happy to own both CD's, and not just because he gave me a free rubber band with my last purchase.

Meanwhile, Beefy Live is just as good as Beefy Not Live. This is probably because his backup band is an iPod.

On the other hand, I can pretty much take or leave people covering videogame music. There are still some standouts that grab my attention, but for the most part, I only find myself liking the songs I already know from playing the games they're attached to. My current theories as to why this might be the case:

1- As a child, I only played games with good music.
2- Most covers of videogame music drain the midi-styled charm that made them so catchy, while failing to inject their own flavor into it.
3- No, really, Final Fantasy music sucks.

PAX 2007: Not A Live Blog

Let me get this out of the way first. I don't know how widely it's been reported, but the Penny Arcade game On The Rain-Slick Precipice Of Darkness is a old-school graphic adventure with turn-based combat. I have seen it with my own eyes while holding several others' eyes in my hands. I had never imagined such a thing. It looks glorious.

We've been off the grid for several days in Seattle, soaking in PAX. On the spot reports are available at 1UP, with varying excesses in punctuation. Not that I blame anyone. Where else can you go from Wil Wheaton decrying government interference in video games to Uwe Boll ranting about foreign policy in less than 3 hours? Nowhere else on Friday, August 24th, 2007, that's where.

We'll be going into more intimate detail throughout the week. Rather than taking a "Day One, 1400 hours" approach, we'll dissect certain aspects of the experience to present a slice of life tableaux. Or at least I will, and I'll remove Mr. Bile's posts if he tries to do otherwise. We may not get to everything before deciding it's completely dated though, so allow me to single out some highlights:

• A day before the convention had even begun, I saw a furry.
• Over the course of three days, I was mistaken for an indie musician, a rock star, and a woman.
• I not only rode three escalators in succession with MC Frontalot, I saw his band demo "Creep" on Rock Band.
• Three people who I met last year at PAX, who I had not heard from since, came up to me and said, "Hey, it's you!" That was neat.
• I met two more nice people at the 1UP panel who might remember me next year.
• I sat through the entire surprise guest panel with Uwe Boll as he dissembled under questioning and, other than the woman who called him out for making racist shit (I think I'm paraphrasing, but I'm sure both those words were used), those who didn't leave the theater backed away from making the honest, incendiary comments they've freely printed anonymously on the Internet since House of the Dead.
• I got a complimentary spongy baseball from ITT Tech, and entered to win my weight in ramen noodles.
• I pwned Mr. Bile in Puzzle Fighter.
• I learned the difference between geeks and hipsters.

More on that last bullet point later this week. Also, the story of PAX as told through T-shirts, a numerical photo essay, we interrogate a poor guy at the Wizards of the Coast booth about D&D 4th edition, and we almost get free drinks and sandwiches twice. What more could you ask for?

Maybe a picture of this guy. I'm sorry. I left my camera in the hotel room most of the weekend, and I didn't realize who he was until it was too late. Mr. Bile, I don't suppose you managed to track down Phoenix Wright and his archenemy in the waning hours of PAX?

PAX?

Is anyone else going to the Penny Arcade Expo? If so, we need to talk before hotel reservations are finalized. Like, stat.

For those of you unfamiliar with the con, it's the annual gaming event put together by the guys at Penny Arcade. There are video game tournaments for those so inclined, and exhibitors offering first or second looks at their upcoming titles. But Mr. Bile and I are more about the music. In addition to PAX alumni MC Frontalot, the NESkimos, and Optimus Rhyme (non-embarrassing nerdcore hip-hop, heavy metal covers of video game music, and a rockin' live band, respectively), this year's lineup includes Freezepop, who you might know from bonus tracks on Guitar Hero I and II, and Jonathan Coulton, the man who brought you "Code Monkey", "Re: Your Brains," and a folk-rock cover of "Baby Got Back."

There's also a very friendly open-gaming room and the Omegathon, where randomly selected attendees compete in front of an audience of 20,000+ in tabletop and videogame challenges. Last year's contest included pre-release Guitar Hero II tracks and Tetris. I'm no prognosticator, but something tells me Carcassone or Catan might be involved this time around. At least, I hope so, because my name is in the hat.

Oh, and Will Wheaton will be there, if you're into that kind of thing. And by that kind of thing, I don't know what I mean. I can only assume that if an appearance by Will Wheaton whets your appetite, you have your reasons.

So there you have it. Several perfectly good reasons to vacation in Seattle the weekend before Labor Day, even if you've never heard of the Fruit Fucker 2000.